Tea Party Signage Goodness

On Sunday, there were Tea Party rallies across the country. And as is now the norm with these sorts of things, signs were abundant. This is neither a good thing, nor a bad thing, but it is in many instances, an amusing thing. I love signs. Let's see if the type of sign that is at every other rally of this sort was present on Sunday. Come on, signers! I know you won't let me down!

First, we're going to need a small child who has no idea what is going on. Do we have one of those? Indeed we do!

Next, we're going to need to see a small child who may have some idea of what is going on, but doesn't look thrilled about it. Do we have one of those?

Check! OK, now we need something inferring that President Barry is a Muslim. (He's not a Muslim, by the way. He's a socialist. That's bad enough. If you don't want to like him, you don't need to make things up. Just don't like him because he's a socialist and you won't end up sounding like a nutjob...or a complete nutjob.)

Yeah, I'm not sure if that really infers that President Barry is a Muslim or not, but it has a pretty good depiction of a rather lopsided mosque and it says "Obama" on it, so it's going to have to do. Up next, I need a sign comparing President Barry to Hitler. Hitler. Anyone? Anyone? What?! NO Hitler comparisons?! OMG!

I could not believe that I didn't see a single sign with Hitler on it. Not one! I was kind of relieved, but I will admit that it also disappointed me just a tad. Hitler is always good for a laugh. Well, now. (It can't be too soon for that kind of joke, can it? Naaaahhh.) I'm going to need a sign that wasn't really thought out very well in terms of spacing.

Don't get me wrong. I suppose that she could have planned it like that. I just am not sure why she would have wanted to. Regardless, kudos to her for putting his hand on there anyway. It does make it kind of stand out a little bit; I will give her that. Now I'm going to need a sign that may have been planned out the way that it was, but it was probably a bad idea because it takes too much work to read it.

It's like looking at one of those charts when you go to the eye doctor. At first, I almost thought that the letters were supposed to spell something. And they are, just not cumulatively. We're still missing a sign which is perfectly fine on its own, but is photographed in an ironic manner.

Yeah, he looks anything but vigilant. He has the right idea for the type of sign that you need for these things, though. Bright colors on a dark background and a simple message. Granted, it's more fun the way that other folks do it, but if you're going for effect, follow this guy's lead. OK, we're almost done with our list here. We're down to needing a sign that makes absolutely NO sense what so ever.

OK, so, yeah. Wow. Is that our standard now? The ol' 18-letter standard? Anything that you can make fit in 18 letters makes for a good comparison, is that how this works? You know what else has 18 letters? TEAPARTYCUCKOOBIRD. And finally, we're going to need at least two signs that just make you laugh. Here's one:

I have no idea what Mickey Mouse has to do with any of this, but that's what makes it amusing. And here's the second one that just makes you laugh:

Good for you, lady, you smart ass cracker, you. Good. For. You.

Signs Of A Protest

Yesterday was May Day, also known as International Workers' Day. For some reason, that seemed to be a good time to break out all of the "We're against Arizona cracking down in illegal immigration because it's racist" rallies. Oh, but they don't use the term "illegal immigration". No, they usually just say "immigration". Listen, doughheads...leaving the "illegal" out of "illegal immigration" is like leaving the "drunk" out of "Mothers Against Drunk Driving". You don't hear them going around calling themselves "Mothers Against Driving", do you? No, of course not. Because why? Because it would be asinine, that is correct.

Speaking of asinine, in downtown Los Angeles, Gloria Estefan spoke out and gave us her opinions. I'm sorry, but did we want her opinions? Why do I give a crap about what a pop singer thinks about a law to combat illegal immigration? Oh, that's right. I don't. I don't give a crap. But she must have thought that people did, as she stood atop a flatbed truck and proclaimed, "We're good people. We've given a lot to this country. This country has given a lot to us." I can't argue with that. This country has given an awful lot to people who don't legally have a right to be here. And this is how we're thanked? Great. I'll remember that. Oh, and by the way? You're welcome. You're freaking welcome.

Now, it wouldn't be an asinine rally without a bunch of poorly made and idiotic signs, would it? Of course not! And I've built up a full head of steam about this whole issue, so let's get right to them, shall we?

Here is a woman proclaiming that "WE JUST WANT A BETTER LIFE". Well, and I want some appropriate capitalization and some decent spacing, but I can understand what she's saying. There are a LOT of people out there in the world who want a better life. We can't do it! Not everyone can live here! It's not possible! Just because you want it doesn't mean you get it, nor does it mean that you're entitled to it!

This sign proclaims "With us, America works". I think that should probably read "With us, America pays". How much of every tax dollar do I pay goes to teaching English as a second language in public schools? That shouldn't be necessary considering that you're theoretically supposed to speak English as a requirement to be a citizen. I'm working AND I'm paying. I don't think that's the case for those who are here illegally and are getting paid in cash and not paying into the tax system, is it?

This young lad wears an ill-thought out sign telling us, "NOW IS THE TIME LEGALIZATION". Actually, I think now is the time for a bigger sign. Y'all barely got that last 'N' in there. Aside from that and the poor grammar (not to mention a questionable violation of child labor laws, making your kid wander around with what equates to a sandwich board on his back. Where's his bell?), I couldn't agree more. It IS time for legalization. If you're not legal, please leave.

The boy underneath this sign looks awfully confused. I am too, considering the sign reads, "DON'T FORGET THAT EVERYTHING HITLER DID IN GERMANY WAS LEGAL." For some reason, the maker of that sign felt the need to make the D-O in DON'T and the 2 Ds in DID into little eyes or something. That's weird. But that aside, when a nation is run by a dictator, as was Germany, the legal system that we are privileged in this country to have ceases to exist. You don't get to have both a dictator and a fair and just legal system, you half-wit. And I feel the need to point out that in Germany, under Hitler, when people were asked for their papers, it was when they were trying to leave, not ENTER. It's clearly NOT the same. Regardless, if you're afraid of folks being rounded up and put into ovens, that's not going to happen. Let me know if it does. I'm against that. But hey, it just wouldn't be a rally without a Hitler reference.

I wish I could see all of this sign, but if grammar alone were reason for deportation, this guy would be on the next bus outta here. It appears to read, "We were born here and they say they're gonna deport us. Where do they gonna send us?" Uh, if I have any say in it, I'm gonna send y'all back to English class. Then I'm going to send y'all to a civics class. If you were born here, because of some bass-ackwards rule, you're automatically a citizen. Now, if your parents were not citizens when they snuck over here and popped you out, they could be deported. I don't know about you, but if I were sent back to my homeland and I had children, my kids are damn well coming with me. No question about it! So we might not gonna send you anywhere, but that doesn't mean y'all shouldn't leave.

This sign could have been much more well thought out. The guy just went with "Nazizona". I would have preferred him to give it a little kick. Something like "Arizona - Putting the AZ back in Nazi". Catchy, no? I'd make a fortune as an idiot signmaker.

This chap wants us to "LEGALIZE MY FUTURE". Hmm. How about we trade? Pretend I have a sign that says "GIMME BACK MY TAX MONEY". Whaddaya say, pal?

Look, let's try and have a little conversation that seems to be getting lost whenever this comes up, OK? Let's be civil about it. I've heard the arguments against this law in Arizona. I understand why some folks are upset about. I don't agree that they have anything to be upset about, but I understand. (By the way, I'm referring to anyone who does NOT say that the law is racist. THAT I do NOT understand and you folks are just softheads.) Now, when are you people who are against this going to listen to what the people who are in favor of it are saying? Why is that only a one way conversation? Furthermore, while I understand that you don't like it, I have yet to hear you offer an alternative solution. What do you want us to do? Do you understand that continuing like we have been is not only financially unsustainable, but is ultimately a threat to national security? Do you GET that? Give me another solution if you don't like this one. In the meantime, put your signs down.